Friday, October 04, 2013

Raw life

Costa Rica

Sprout salad. I experimented alot

On the beach SOUTH BEACH fruit stands

This was Boutenkos recipe for GREEN PUDDING with kiwi

Dehydrated seeds. I think it worked

Raw chai

Experiments with raw flax crackers and raw nut butters

This pate was zucchini hummous recipe

Where I worked as paralegal

I used to take these green smoothies to work

I think this is a Matt Amsden raw vegan recipe

Nut butter and bananas and pine nuts

Salads at my work

Sprouted grain puddings I used to make, with starfruit

My office, or cubicle and my raw lunches

Sprouted wheat raw porridge

I would like to make myself proud. I know when I am not proud of myself. I know when I am proud. If I can impress me, what a high life that is! Always striving to experience this heightened sense of me, where I feel it, almost in my spine.. A brilliance, a gift.
If I can impress myself, if I can be the actress in life playing the character that is me. WOW, and succeeding and succeeding.. and winning my way. ALl the time, it's my way. I am in charge of the light inside.

The following quote was taken from Doug Graham
“People who are emotionally attached to cooked foods aren’t actually addicted to them since it is physiologically impossible to be addicted to something that is harmful to us. The body simply is not put together that way. It is designed to thrive and cannot become addicted to a harmful substance. The human psyche, however, can become very much addicted to the shift in perception that occurs after we ingest certain substances. A yearning for that shift in perception is the ever-present illusion that lures us to eat cooked foods.”

The first belief: 

"Cooked food is so bad for people to eat"

1. Is it true?
2. Can you absolutely know it’s true?
3. How do you react when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without the thought?
Turn it around.

1. Yes it is True
2. I cannot know that this is absolutely true, it could be thoughts people have. So If I can;t know this for sure, it's a lie.
3. Well I feel awful when in my mind I dream about cooked foods like fried eggs, I feel its wrong.  I feel sorry for my fellow men,
 like they do not know any better. I feel I have an advantage over them. I feel wiser. Like others are idiots or do
 not care about life and joy, That I do. I feel separation. I feel I am not like other people. I feel I am my own thing. Lonely. I have to be on guard
and I am obsessed with gross greasy foods. I take photos of that stuff alot.
4. Without the concept cooked food is bad for people to eat, I would just be like everybody else. I would look at cooked food and
 think nothing. I would look at people eating cooked food and actually they would start to look good to me. I would feel such a love for 
my fellow men, like they are doing well for themselves. I would release that cancer inside of thinking something out there is wrong.
This is hard because I have washed my brain over so many years of thinking it was bad for people to eat, but if I just let that go 
in my mind, I would be in a world filled with very attractive men...and women who cook with love their food. It's an art. 
I would not eat cooked food, because it is not for me but the world would open up and I would belong to my equals.

Turnaround to opposite: "Cooked food is so good for people to eat" and find three reasons:

-It tastes pretty good on the tongue.
-It fills you up for a very long time
- It bonds people, families. Takes hard work and skill..

Turned around to the other

"People are so good for cooked food to eat up"
-Cooked food does shorten lives ( why does this bring me back to my story?)
-Cooked food eats people up and makes them weak
-Cooked food is very alluring and just is bait.

Turnaround to the self

"Cooked food is so good for me to eat"
-In case I am ever starving and there is some cooked veggies around, it will sustain me.
-I do not want to look orthorexic on dates so if I try a little something I can pass as normal.
-I can try little tastes of things and still be ok.

Second belief

" I do not want cooked food to appear in my thoughts"

1. Is it true?

2. Can you absolutely know it’s true?
3. How do you react when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without the thought?
Turn it around.

1. Yes its true

2. I cannot absolutely know this is true, it could be a good thing I think it, who knows?
3.I feel scared , threatened, demanding. When it appears I feel guilty for feeling any sort of pleasure.
I feel like these thoughts are wrong, I must overcome them, or wait until they never come back again.
Helpless, out of control, a slave to my desires, I feel like its disgusting and that means a part of my
mind is too. I feel like I have to be on guard and look out over myself. I cannot trust my life withotu my brain to guide it.
4. Without the desire for those cravings to go away, please..I am happy, youthful, here and now, in the present. I see those 
cravings and I do not have any judgement and they pass right out of my mind.
Thoughts just fly by me and without fearing that thought, it leaves to. I find I am the one who keeps those thoughts
around by calling them bad. If they are good, they leave me. I eat raw vegan food if I am hungry.


" I do want cooked food to appear in my thoughts" ( meditate on how this could be true 3 times)
-It comforts me
-gives me what my body needs to feel
-Takes my mind off everything, provides and outlet

Turnaround to other

"I  want my thoughts to disappear of cooked food"
-I wish I could replace those thoughts with something else that gives me more comfort
-I need to exercise more freedom within to express my longings
-Instead of focusing on the food I will focus on me and my love for myself

Turnaround to self

" I do not want cooked food to appear inside myself"
-I like the raw vegan diet
-I want to feel bliss all the time and am finding it with 80/10/10
-I like being skinny and thin


"I do not want myself to appear in my thoughts"

-When I crave cooked food, and feel guilty, I want to cut out myself from my thoughts
-I want myself to be banished from my mind when it craves cooked food
-I want to kill myself in my mind, like I need to be expelled because I am wrong


Third belief

"Cooked food is unhealthy, not people food, beauty destroying, fatty.."

1. Is it true?

2. Can you absolutely know it’s true?
3. How do you react when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without the thought?
Turn it around.


2. I cannot know this is the absolute cause no, It could be thoughts
3.I feel disgusted with it,. I feel like its the culprit of all of man;s woes. It is the enemy, The bueaty destroyer
I treat it like formula, like its nothing. Tasteless fat and sweet poof.
I feel like I am a know it all. I feel preachy. I condemn every cooked fooders diet secretly.
I blame their personalities on what kind of food they eat.
I feel separation
4. If thought left my brain, I would be a beautiful person who does not judge or throw mud. I would be welcoming, accepting and
I would see the good in all forms of people created art. I would take responsibilty for my thoughts about beauty.
I would be a genuinely kind person. I would have an innocence, trust. Lookin at cooked food in my mind
 without that thought I would just see something pretty, or good looking. I still would not eat it I would just live in such a beautiful clean world


"Cooked food is healthy,  people food, beautifying, lean.."

-Beautiful thin models eat cooked food and cooked meat
-it's a great way of man to process what nature gave us so we can eat everything and thrive
-We have made ourselves able to eat anything on the planet
-It's how we eat as a species, how we grow, how we stay alive and have energy
-Michael Phelps

Turnaround to other

"Cooked food is unhealthy, Cooked food is not people food, cooked food is beauty destroying and fatty.."

Cannot do it, so I use, " My thinking.."

"My thinking is unhealthy, not people food, beauty destroying, fatty.."

- My thoughts are filled with cancers and disease, about cooked food, its just my thougths that are toxic.
-I am the one who judges this and makes this so
-I create this in my head

Turnaround to myself

"I am unhealthy,I eat not people food,  i am beauty destroying, I am fatty.."
-I eat avocados when I know fats are bad
-I overeat nuts from the grocery store
-I have drank cacao mylks and thought it was good.

#6 answer

" I look forward to.."

" I am willing to"

I don’t ever want to binge on cooked food ever again

I look forward to binging on cooked food again to see that it is harmless, all bad things are thoughts in my head

I am willing to binge on cooked food again to prove that I will be just fine, perfect maybe.


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